i thought i was supposed to be blessed?

I want to share with you all that I am following a series of sermons right now from the pastor of Brentwood Baptist Church. They have a midweek service through the church called Kairos. They meet on Tuesday night at 7 for anyone in the area that would like to check it out. I highly recommend it to anyone I know, and I can't wait to be back in the area so I can attend in person again. But, for now, the sermons are on podcasts through itunes. Right now I am going through a series he did last year about Revelation. It is a fabulous series, done in a way that I've never experienced a study on Revelation before. I remember when my dear friend, Nikki, first invited me to go with her and she said they were studying Revelation, I kind of went, 'eh.' But I can tell you that it really is unbelievable the way he turns it around and explains it to people like me. I started attending right in the middle of the series, so now I am going back and listening from the beginning. So, this is where most of the inspiration comes from with my posts. Anybody that wants to listen to the sermons yourself, you can find the podcasts for free on itunes HERE. There is a video version, but there is only about 7 of the sermons through video. But there is also an audio version that has all of the sermons in the series. you can download those to your ipod and listen to them in the car. it's great. most of the sermons are between 30 and 50 minutes though, so make sure you have some quiet time set aside to sit down and listen.

ok, plug over.

I wrote yesterday about putting God first in your life, and blessings will come your way. Which is a wonderful aspect of God. I love how he blesses us so much with not just huge miracles that are obvious, but also with little, tiny everyday miracles. but with those blessings, also comes many trials. "To whom much has been given, of him much will be required in return."

So many times when bad things in our lives happen, we cry out, "O God! Why me? I thought you loved me. I thought you said if i did everything I was supposed to do, that you would bless me. Why is this happening? Why now?"

But we so desperately need to understand that being a Christian doesn't mean things are always going to be great for us. Why do we  think that because we have Jesus on our side that we get a 'get out of jail free' card? Look to our example, Jesus. He came to set before us an example of how to live. our ways are supposed to match up with his ways. our behavior is supposed to reflect that of Christ. Jesus was perfect. absolutely perfect, in every possible way. even more perfect than Mary Poppins, and that's a pretty tough act to follow, right? just kidding. But look at Jesus' life! Was his life full of puppies and rainbows? The purest, most perfect creature to walk the face of this Earth, you'd think he would be held in a little higher of esteem. but he wasn't. he was beaten and tortured to the point that he wasn't even recognizable as a man! If the King of the Universe was treated like that, if that's how the world chose to 'cherish' the Shepherd, what on earth makes us think that we, as his sheep, are going to be treated any differently???

The moment that we hand over control of our life to God, we become the arch enemy of satan. We thought life was bad before we became a Christian, just wait. since he can't defeat God, then he's going to try to attack and destroy everything that God loves the most. And in the beginning, satan might attack your weaknesses. but as we grow and learn, we realize that we have to protect those weaknesses. and his plan doesn't work anymore, so he moves on to our strengths. the area that we think we have a hold of. we are so confident in these areas that we don't guard them. Pastor Mike is always talking about oreos. he knows that oreos are his weakness, so he's got that covered. he doesn't even go down the cookie aisle. if he doesn't go down the aisle, he's not going to be tempted. but satan grabs him in the ice cream aisle. he didn't know there was oreo ice cream! he was in the area to get a frozen pizza, and boom. his strong point has been attacked. we are so busy guarding our ears and our eyes. we focus on watching nothing but touched by an angel and left behind and facing the giants, and listening to christian music. we don't even have the other stations as presets anymore. but then satan attacks your heart. you forgot to guard it while you were trying so hard to put good things into your mind. you pour so much energy into your family, protecting your children, and raising them the way you know God wants you to raise them, but then satan swoops in and attacks your marriage. you thought you were strong in your marriage. you thought nothing could touch that area in your life, so you didn't protect it. on and on and on. satan will not give up. if you don't think that there is a power out there to attack and destroy you, than you aren't paying attention.

that's why in ephesians 6, paul emphasizes the whole part about putting on the armor of God. every day. we always have to be prepared for a battle, every second of our day. even as i sit here and type this, satan is begging me to do something else. when i sit down to pray or write or read, my mind is all of a sudden FULL of everything that i need to get done. all of the things that i've been wanting or needing to do suddenly become of absolute importance. right now, there is a show that i've been dying to watch from last week and i haven't had the chance to watch it. and satan is trying to get me to stop writing and go watch that show. and it probably wouldn't hurt, i can type the same things an hour from now that i can type right now, but i'm not going to give in. that's exactly what he wants. and i'm stubborn like that. just because i know he wants it, i'm not going to do it.
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for each other." Ephesians 6:10-18
Stay in the word. Read the Bible. When Jesus fought satan, he retaliated with scripture. that is the most powerful tool we have. hide those words in your heart so that when a questions comes up, you will know the answer. never stop praying. have fellowship with other christians. "the first person we lie to is ourselves." we need accountability from each other. when we read a scripture outloud, we might think to ourselves that oh, that doesn't apply to me. but our friends around us say, oh yes it does. they see the fruit in our lives. be honest with each other. don't put up fronts. don't pretend to be something you're not. it's ok to be vulnerable. it's ok to show others the deepest, darkest parts of your heart. that is something that i really struggle with and something that God is working on me with. hence, why you are reading this blog. it's ok to be raw and to be real with not only yourself, but with the people that you love. we get stronger by lifting more weight. we gain endurance by running longer. we gain knowledge as a christian by studying and listening more.

i learned how lions hunt today. they don't hunt in the herds of their prey. but they chase the herd. they chase the herd until they get scared enough to separate. and then, the weak get tired. and they get slower. they aren't strong enough to keep up with the others. and they fall behind, until they are caught up with. and they die, alone, and are eaten.

satan works in the same way. he pushes and tempts until the weak finally give way. he pulls us away from the truth. gives us any excuse whatsoever not to get up and go to church. gives us a million things that would be time better spent than sitting still and reading the bible. and slowly, little by little, we grow apart from our brothers and sisters in Christ. and we get weaker, and we get slower, and eventually we die. and satan wins. he has captured his prey.

but i also learned today, that sometimes, the bad things that happen to us, aren't always persecution. sometimes, it's just life. there is a country song that i absolutely hate. it's about this man who is down and out. he's broke, he's having problems with his wife, his kids are out of control, and he comes to a friend and is telling him about his problems. and his friend pats him on the shoulder and says, "well, that sounds like life to me." i HATE it!! when i'm telling somebody about my problems, i would be so so SO angry if they did that to me. i want them to hug me and tell me it's going to be ok and encourage me. but, you know it's the truth. sometimes we cry out to God and ask him 'why oh why' and he tells us, it's just life, child. we wash our car and it rains and we ask, why does God hate us? it's just life! people we love get sick, we lose jobs, and our kids grow up to hate us. it doesn't mean that God hates us! it's just part of the pleasure we get have of living on this great earth.

bad things are going to happen to us. life is going to be down right crappy at times. sometimes it's the persecution of the daily battle raging within us caused by the dark powers of satan. while sometimes, it's just the way that life happens. and NO, it's not fair!! it's not fair when we've worked so hard for something, and we don't get the result we want. it's not fair when we've prayed endless prayers, and they don't get answered. it's not fair when bad things happen to good people. but, why do we expect to be treated like royalty? we think our lives are bad now, but we don't really know the half of it. most of us have never had to experience persecution like we've seen happen throughout history. and it's only going to get worse. but are we willing to fight? what do we do when the worst thing possible we can think of happens? can we still keep the faith? when life doesn't turn out like we thought it was going to, can we hang on? when your spouse, or someone you loves gets ill, will we stay? when someone dies, can we look past our own grief and praise God anyway? when your loved one is old, and they don't even remember who you are anymore, will you still go visit? when God lets bad things happen around us, when we are persecuted, when we are tested, are we strong enough to hold on and not let go.

i'm working on it everyday.